Equipping

My first two years out of college were spent teaching at Pepperell Middle School in Lindale, Georgia. Although my degree was in the area of the Social Sciences I was pleased when they called upon me to teach two hours of Physical Education each day for sixth grade boys. With my love of sports this was like getting dessert with every meal for me. The school was fairly new and had a small gym that was just large enough to accommodate a basketball court with no room for spectators (in other words; as small as a gym can possibly be). In addition, there were no designed playing fields. To add to the challenge I was assigned 60 students each hour. It doesn’t stop there. Two other P.E. classes were meeting at the same hour. We were limited on facilities, overcrowded with students, and forced to do a job with much patience, cooperation, and creativity. I loved it! I did this for two years and learned to focus on what I had rather than what I did not have to get the job done. I think the Lord was preparing me.

The first full-time ministry post for me was with students and children at Hebron Baptist Church in Dacula, Georgia. You may know the story of how mightily God blessed in allowing us to see hundreds of students come to Christ in the decade when I had responsibility for students. Did you ever hear about the Student ministry facilities there? Well actually, we never had any. How about the student ministry offices? Too much to say here but you would not be impressed. I would visit other churches with admitted envy when I saw the facilities that they provided for the students and the student ministry staff. But…I was determined to never let that stop me from doing what I could with what I had.

I can always stand to have a larger budget, more office space, more staff, and more elevation of my ministry by key leaders. But it would be a shame to pass up great opportunities by focusing on what I do not have rather than thanking God for what I do have and trusting Him to work, not through the strength of what I am provided, but by the strength of His Spirit. You need not be afraid to ask for more but do not base your ministry on resources so much as your passion, leadership, creativity, and most importantly, reliance on the Holy Spirit. John G. Miller sums it up this way:

“As individuals, focusing on what we don’t have rather than on what we can accomplish with what we do have is a waste of time and energy. In the end, outstanding organizations and their people get the job done with the tools and resources they have been given.”

Good words!

 

Every church experiences the loss of members. Not every loss is a bad reflection on the church or its leadership. Sometimes people move out of the community and can no longer feasibly continue to be an active participant in the former church. Sometimes people are disgruntled and quite frankly were inclined to create problems rather than resolve them. No one generally regrets the loss of trouble makers. Some people who leave have not been involved in years or never really plugged in to begin with. And then of course there is the loss of those who go on into eternity.

While the loss of some members can simply be a reflection of the normal course of life, like the death of a senior saint, losses can also be detrimental. What happens when the number of people leaving are outpacing the number of new people being reached? What about those that have been lost because of failure on the part of the current leadership to provide ministry in times of need? How about those who drift away because of hurt, whether real or perceived, because of broken or damaged relationships? You can easily overlook losses when the church is growing. But should you? If you ignore the losses of members, you are missing an opportunity for personal growth and a pathway to more effective leadership and ministry. I want to propose that five things should always be true when a family or member leaves your church:

1. A leader of the church has engaged in a conversation with every member or head of family who leaves to determine the bottom line for why they are departing.
2. In the event that someone has been wronged, or perceives they have been wronged, the leadership proactively seeks reconciliation, not based on whether they will return or not, but based on biblical responsibility.
3. Someone in the church has responsibility for tracking who engaged in the conversation, when it happened, what the bottom line reasoning for the departure was, and documents any response from the church when and if applicable.
4. Every three to four months (minimum), the pastor along with key leaders examines the documentation to determine if there are identifiable patterns. For example: Six of nine families left because of concerns or problems related to the preschool ministry. That is a pattern. Some action is needed to prevent other families from the same experiences. Another example: Three of the twelve families that left in last few months were put off by the political comments of a Bible Study leader. All three couples were in the same group. Is there a problem here? Maybe and maybe not, but it is worth consideration.

Some people seem to live disgruntled lives and cannot be satisfied. Others are looking to be served rather than to serve and move from church to church. But, when you lose committed members who have not left the community, you would do well to ask the hard questions. Really, it is not the questions that are hard. It is the answers! They can hurt, but they can also prompt us to improve. One more proposal if you want to take it all the way.

5.  In spite of the fact that the church is losing someone, and if the departure is                                               determined and inevitable, they graciously and proactively help the departing members find another church. That is a kingdom mindset that is rarely found in churches. I don’t want to lose anyone but I would rather one of my members find a new place to serve, worship, and thrive, than to see them disconnect. That would certainly be a reflection of their immaturity but the fact is that our church was given the task of bringing them into maturity. Therefore, I want them in church. If not mine, then yours.

Customers do not exist for the business but rather a business exists for the customer.

The same could be said for a ministry such as the Georgia Baptist Mission Board where I serve. Our customers (church leaders) do not exist for us but rather our ministry exists for our customers (church leaders). Don’t misinterpret my point. I understand that we exist to serve the Lord and that our focus is to personally seek to reduce lostness but the way we do that is by serving churches. More specifically by serving the people (leaders) who make up the churches. If you are a leader in a church or even a leader in the business world, the same principle applies.

I recall a summer camp trip some years ago with several bus-loads of teens and hungry adults as we stopped at a Mc——-s for breakfast and restroom breaks. As you are probably aware, Mc——-s has sold several billion units of their primary product. As I exit the bus I am envisioning employees who are thinking; “Alright! Lots of customers! That is what makes us so successful. What an opportunity and what a blessing that they stopped here instead of at a competitor’s restaurant!” Nothing could have been further from the truth. You would have thought we came in to commit a robbery. The employees were visibly irritated that the volume of work suddenly increased. They were more focused on the inconvenience (having to buckle down) of the next ninety minutes than the fact that more customers are good for their future prospects. Especially if they provide good service and good food.

I recently took my wife’s car to get a faulty blinker replaced. I felt like they practically dropped everything to help me and within about twenty minutes my car was ready. I did not have an appointment. “How much do I owe you?” I asked. “Not a thing” he responded with a smile.  “Just come on back next time you need service.” Well, you can bet that I will! [A shout out to Watkins Tire and Auto in Hamilton Mill.]

When a person goes to work they should never be surprised when they have to actually….work. I love our country as I know that you do. But you are well aware of the entitlement mentality that prevails in our modern culture. Outstanding organizations are purposeful in creating a culture with a strong work ethic with a focus on the mission more than on personal entitlements. The work is done with diligence, with enthusiasm, with balance (proper rest & family are not sacrificed), and with attention to the mission. Work in the economy of God is not an inconvenience, but a blessing. Let’s get to work!

Adapted from Chapter Twenty-Two of John G. Millers, Outstanding: 47 Ways to Make Your Organization Exceptional …

What compels people to choose your business or organization over others?Read More »

Please take eight minutes to invest in your leadership as you listen in as I provide equipping for the staff I lead. In this webinar I delivered to my staff, you will hear the portion where I share what I have observed over the years to be the key qualities of spiritual leaders. Enjoy!

A couple of months ago I posted an article on ways that Grandparents can help their grandchildren connect to church beyond their childhood years and into their adult lives. While, admittedly, the parents carry the greatest weight of responsibility and influence, Christian grandparents possess a deep and natural concern for the spiritual progress, as well as the eternal destiny of the grandkids. The issue is certainly addressed much easier when the parents of the grandchildren are fully engaged in the life of the church. When Tom Crites and I conducted our research and wrote about it in our book, Why They Stay, we laid out the fifteen major issues that affect the likelihood that children would stay connected to church as adults. Grandparents were not among those fifteen issues. But, that does not mean that they cannot or should not strive to make a difference. In my previous article I shared ideas particularly applicable for those whose grandchildren had parents who were not raising them in church. The four points were:

1. Revitalize your relationship with your adult children (so there are no barriers to your influence).
2. Do what you must to get your grandchildren to Jesus.
3. Share the tools (of how to keep children connected) with your adult children.
4. Be a model of faith and a cheerleader for the faith development of your grandchildren.

I have a grandson who has parents very actively engaged in the life of the church. Let me share three additional points that apply in this more positive circumstance.

1. Model a healthy marriage to your adult children. My wife and I recently celebrated 35 years of marriage. I am blessed to say that I am happily married. One of many keys is that I became a student of healthy marriages long ago. A healthy marriage is not only more enjoyable for my wife and I, but it also has a spiritual effect on our children.  I want them to know that in spite of current cultural trends that long, life-time, happy marriages are possible. It takes work, a forgiving spirit, flexibility, patience, and unconditional love, among other things, but it can be accomplished. Why does this matter? It matters because if my adult children have healthy marriages, the likelihood of my grandchildren coming to faith and connecting to church for life is greatly increased.
2. I am determined that my wife and I will never be the source of conflict in my children’s marriages. Did you know that one of the four leading causes of marital conflict is “in-laws.” I have several in-law jokes in my humor repertoire but this is no laughing matter. I hope my married children never have any really serious marital problems, but if they do, I am determined that it will not be me. Don’t be the source of the conflict! Your children were to “leave and cleave.” Give them the appropriate amount of space.
3. I am investing tangibly in the marriages of my adult children. God put something on my heart as I continued to work through what I learned that keeps kids connected to church for life. If it is indeed true that strong marriages greatly increase the likelihood of lifetime church commitment then I need to invest in my children’s marriage. I will not say the amount because we all have varying levels of resources at our disposal. But take note of what my wife and I have done. I explained to my two married daughters that we have set aside money in a fund that is available to them for any of the following:

• It may be used to attend a couples or marriage enrichment retreat.
• It may be used to by a book or any resource that will educate them about a stronger marriage.
• It may be used, without any judgment from me, for marriage counseling.

The message communicated to my adult children is as important as the amount of money. I am there to encourage their marriages to grow and be strong.

Because, if and when it is, it makes a difference to my grandchildren. And in case you didn’t know it, my grands are the best!

For as he thinks in his heart, so is he. . .

                                                Proverbs 23:7

Last week I shared the following:

 

The way that we think is important because it is our thinking that affects our actions.  The way in which we think comprises our attitude.  Good attitudes lead to better decisions and healthier decisions.  Churches also have attitudes that we often refer to as a “church culture.”  Like individuals, congregations as a group have corporate attitudes. What is the attitude of your church?  How does your congregation think?

 

Some years ago, one of my peers in a neighboring state studied the thinking of churches in his region. For the purpose of this study effective churches were defined as those who were experiencing growth in membership.  He found eleven distinctive attitudes that were clearly opposite from the corporate attitudes in churches that were plateaued or declining.

 

You should note that the congregations had much in common.  They were Baptist Churches, with small group ministries that generally met prior to worship, and provided the typical ministries and programs you would associate with a Southern Baptist congregation. While the programming and ministries were similar, some were growing while others were not.  What was the difference?  It was not the style or the programming.  It was the mentality of the congregation.

 

I took one other step in examining these attitudes.  I connected the scriptural basis for the attitudes.  How does your church think?

 

I shared the first five last week. Here are the others:

(E= Corporate attitude in effective churches & I= Corporate attitude in ineffective churches)

Energy Level

Acts 2:46-47

E- Church is fun and possesses a high level of enthusiasm.

I- Church is viewed as a duty and/or obligation.  Somber spirit pervaded.  Energy poured into maintenance rather than touching the community.

Music

Psalm 150

E- There was admitted tension in this area in the effective churches. However, there was an acknowledgement that the greatest growth possibilities tended to be among the younger population. Therefore, adjustments were made where needed to aid in the appeal to young families. The churches were slowly making changes in this area.

I-Music was viewed as a sensitive subject and there was a reluctance to discuss it or make any adjustments.

*Please note that the style of music according to other studies is not as relevant as the “life and quality” of the music.  The only style that was not found in growing churches was “high church” style. 

Expectations of Pastor

Ephesians 4:11-12

E- a) The pastor was viewed as an equipper.

1. b) There was a “teach me to minister” attitude.

I- a) The pastor was called to preach, visit, and counsel.

1. b) There was a “minister to me” attitude.

Willingness to Change

Matthew 15:1-9

E- a) There was an understanding that growth demands change.

1. b) Evangelism was such a priority that it forced the churches to try new things.

I- a) Keeping traditions was a “critical value.”

1. b) Change was seen as too great a price to pay.

 

Role of Laity

I Corinthians 12:7

E- Attendance was desired, but most important value was involvement in ministry.

I- Involvement was characterized in terms of attending and giving.

 

Spiritual Growth

II Corinthians 5:16-17

E- Measured and described in relation to changed lives.

I- Measured and described in relation to Bible knowledge.

 

“Is it really Monday already?”

“The weekend can’t get here quick enough!”

“Do I really have to get up and go to work today?”

John G. Millers says that “some people hate their jobs, feel trapped, feel under appreciated, and are miserable about what they do each day.” Their dissatisfaction with their work turns them into “clock watchers.” Each day begins by counting down the hours until quitting time or until the weekend. The days are long, the work is tedious, and any passion for the job is absent. I worked with someone just like this during my first year out of college. I taught at Pepperell Middle School in Lindale, Georgia and I loved going to work every day. I was located in a classroom right next to a more experienced teacher who apparently had the gift of whining. As a 21 year old young man, my thought was, “Why do you work here? If this is so horrible, why don’t you go do something else?”

I was too respectful to say it out loud to an elder to whom I was newly acquainted. Sadly this teacher was cheating. She (in this particular case a female, but I have encountered as many men with the same issue) was cheating herself and she was cheating the students. I do not know about you, but I want someone teaching my child who is passionate and excited about the opportunity to serve my child. I determined at 21 years of age that I would always do my work with passion and that if I could not that I would step aside so that someone who had passion for the position could give the role what it deserves. I still hold to that today.

Most of the leaders that I work with are blessed to serve in some vocational ministry. Their job is a ministry and their ministry is a job. However, the ministry dynamic does not immunize those who serve in ministry from potential dissatisfaction. Let me say that there is nothing wrong with looking forward to the weekend or to some much needed time off. However, if you lose your passion for what you do, for what the organization is all about, and you live for the weekend instead of for the opportunity to serve….then you must take honest account of yourself. I have served in my current ministry for almost 18 years. I can’t believe it. The time has flown by. I am more of a “calendar watcher” than a “clock watcher.” I have seen the years fly by doing what I love…serving the Lord through a series of ministry assignments at the Georgia Baptist Mission Board.

I heard Dr. Johnny Hunt say recently that you should always look forward to going to work and always look forward to going home. When both are true you will not simply be balanced, but be content and much more effective wherever you are. Be true to yourself and more importantly be true to the Lord. Be sure that the person serving in your role does so with passion. Hopefully, it is you!

Perhaps you have known someone who was smart but lacked common sense. Or someone who always dressed very professionally but came across as rude and critical. Or someone who had a great personality but never seemed to get anything accomplished. Having intelligence, a good education, a professional demeanor, attractive appearance,  a great looking resume, an impressive title, and/or the ability to impress peers or employees with people you know or have connected with can be an advantage. However, many people who possess these qualities are quickly viewed by those they work for or work alongside as incompetent if any of the following eight issues begin surface in your work or leadership. Here are the first four:

1. When you are perceived as lazy. I have taught my three daughters this principle and it has served them well. One is a senior in college with a 3.96 G.P.A.. A second is an elementary school teacher and by her second year was being tapped to orient new teachers on how to excel in managing their classroom. A third leveraged her work ethic into a $4.50 per hour raise last year. I shared with them how sadly easy it is to out-perform the average person by simply working a little harder (which is not that hard). Arrive a little earlier, stay a little later, be known as someone who gets the job done, don’t be a complainer, volunteer to do extra, and when you have an idea, own it and work to make it happen. But, whatever you do, never, never, never let it be said of you that you are lazy. If so, you will be viewed as incompetent no matter what your qualifications may be.
2. When you are not purposefully punctual. This issue is cultural and you ignore it at your own leadership peril. Being on time, finishing on time, completing work on time, following agreed upon timelines, and timely responses to all forms of communications are examples of how punctuality needs to be applied. Everyone is subject to getting stuck in traffic, having a family emergency, or occasionally getting snowed under by the workload resulting in falling behind or being late. It is understandable. However, failure on this point should be the exception rather than the rule. Otherwise, you may have the highest academic degree in the room, but people are viewing you as lacking in competence.
3. When you cannot get organized. This is a tough one for those who do not have administrative skills or gifts. The higher you go in an organization, the more you can get by with disorganization if you have the prerogative to compensate by bringing people around you who can organize for you. However, at any level of leadership or service, the inability to organize comes across as lack of competence even if you have the higher I.Q.  If it is not your gift, you must make it a discipline or surround yourself with others who do it for you.
4. When you are unwilling to adopt new technologies. In order to be viewed as a competent leader, you need not be tech savvy nor do you need to possess the latest technological device. However, you must be tech aware at a minimum. I know some people who have titles, degrees, experience, and intelligence, but refuse to use email, to text, to engage in social networking, or to change day to day practices or communications. In spite of their resume, people view them as incompetent, especially followers who are younger. You need to know what the current communication preferences are, know the lingo of social networking even if you do not plug into every source, and continuously have a willingness to adopt new forms of technology and communication. Here is why…every day of your life, the number of people younger than you is dramatically growing. They are suspicious to start with and you only enhance their skepticism of your leadership when you are not at least “tech aware.” Unfortunately, your actions, or lack thereof, lead them to interpret you as incompetent. Don’t allow that to happen.